Grazing

It’s been 5 days now that I’ve been taking the steroids and so far I have not shown any signs of truly crazy behavior. Kind of disappointing. No rage filled outbursts, no uncontrollable tears, no attempted to leap to my death. Nothing. I was hoping to be able to use “insanity due to medication” to get out of some criminal charges. Oh well, maybe next time. So yes, we can all breathe a little easier now.

The side effects are really minor, but there have been a few “slight” changes in behavior.

I do get pretty wired at night. I wake up anywhere from 3 to 6 times a night. I just look at the ceiling, swear a little bit, and then roll over and try to fall back asleep. Over and over and over.

The worst part of the medication is that I am hungry all the time. I am not even joking or exaggerating at all. I wake up and I am starving, I go to work and I am starving, I go home and I am starving, I just finish eating and I am starving, I go to bed and I am starving. In three words…I am starving. I can feel my clothes getting a little bit tighter. I would blame the washer and dryer for shrinking my clothes, but I haven’t done laundry yet. So that excuse won’t fly. Please I beg you, if you see me eating, do everything you can to knock the food out of my hand. I am tempted to go and have my jaw wired shut. I am eating without even thinking about it. I look down and I have the remains of a cookie in my hand and crumbs all over my shirt and I don’t even remember buying a cookie! I could maybe even eat Thai food…that’s how out of control it’s getting.

I am like a cow out in a pasture just grazing all day long.

Chomp, chomp, chomp.