I actually fell asleep…for a little while, at least. Can you believe it? But, when my alarm went off at 7 AM, I actually did swear a little. I just remember thinking “Go figure. The one &^#@$*%$@ time I actually fall asleep is the morning when I have to get up early to go and do yoga for the first time in my life. Dammit. Screwed at every turn, as usual.” So I got up and got ready for my adventure in fitness. Tyler was going to come along but he was sick. So he popped some more Dramamine and went back to bed. Which, in hindsight, was for the best. Yoga is not for the weak. Tyler probably could have never hacked it. Cry baby.
When I got up to the fitness center, Susan came up to me and grabbed me and said how happy she was that I showed up. Now, Susan is a vision of insanity in the morning. She was wearing a tank top with her bra showing, leggings with boxer shorts over the top of them, leg warmers on her knees, and high heel shoes. She then continued to tell me that I will need to modify the poses since I have never done it before and that it was fine. I took my place on my little foam mat in the corner and began stretching. I think it’s actually been years since I stretched out. After a series of loud snaps, crackles, and pops I was ready to begin yoga-ing. Once it started, there was no turning back. Boom! Down on the mat, back up, leg twisted, arm in the air. Over and over and over. Susan would yell at me from across the room. “Jason, get your arm up. Make the line!” “Modify, Jason, modify!” “You did it, Jason. Awesome line!” Then she would come over and poke, prod, poke, pull, poke, and push my body into submission. Downward dog is the only position name I remember. I thought it would be funny to bark once, but when she walked past me I chickened out and went with my better judgment to not do it. Susan would have probably killed me. After an hour of crazy positions and intense sweating class was over. I was exhausted. Yoga is a lot of hard work. Who knew?
After class I returned to cabin and got cleaned up for the day. I was rather looking forward to the adventure of the day…snorkeling off the private island in the Bahamas. How freakin’ cool is that? The ship anchored off the coast of the island and we had to take smaller boats over to the island. While sitting on the ferry boat we were joking around and this guy behind us heard Becca joke about being a surrogate. Well, that got his attention and started drilling her about it. Hilarious. He was a little crazy, if you ask me. Definitely a few fries short of a Happy Meal. A few moments later we saw Rosie and her family get onto our boat. I figured this would be a good time to go and talk to her. So I got up and went down to the lower level of the boat and waited to chat. Here’s the exchange...
Jason: Hi Rosie! I just wanted to thank you for this trip.
Rosie: You’re welcome. I hope you are having fun.
Jason: Yeah, I am... It’s amazing. I won it on your blog.
Rosie: You did? That’s fantastic. Well let me shake your hand.
*gets up and shakes my hand*
Jason: The crazy thing is 10 years ago I worked for your show as an intern.
Rosie: Really? Wow. Wait….was I nice to you?
Jason: Yes, you were. You were very kind to me.
Rosie: That’s good to know. After my show ended everyone started saying how I was a real bitch to them. *she laughs*
Jason: Not to me. You were great. You really were.
And with that I said goodbye and rejoined my friends.
The island was AMAZING. It was beautiful. White sands and crystal clear water. We went snorkeling and saw fish (a lot of Dorys, but no Nemos) and even a stingray. I was a little nervous around the stingray. Granted the Steve Irwin accident was a freak one-in-a million incident, but with my luck I would be the two-in-a-million victim. I have terrible luck with animals. I’ve been bitten by a horse, stalked by a wild turkey, tripped by a puppy, and the list can go on and on. No lie. The stingray was fearless and would go as close to the shore as it could. You would just see people scatter like crazy to get out of it’s path. So clearly I was not alone in being cautious. I loved snorkeling. I had never done it before and I definitely want to do it again. It’s one of the most peaceful and relaxing things I have ever done. I am such a fan of water to begin with. I love all things aquatic (except seaweed), so I was definitely in my element.
We found a small hermit crab by our chairs. I did enjoy playing with it until it pinched my finger. After I was brutally attacked by the crab, I lost all interest in it. Hopefully one of the birds got him. That would be the ultimate revenge. Stupid crab.
The day was spent just hanging out, swimming, snorkeling, and relaxing. Incase you were wondering…yes I did sing “La Isla Bonita” on the island. I did twirl in the sand and splash in the water. “Tropical island breeze…all that makes you wild and free”. Yeah, I did it…and I don’t care who saw it. I’m owning it.
Later than night we went to the Euan Morton concert. Becca scored us seats up in the balcony and Ross the Intern and his mom were in our row. I’m a huge Ross fan, so I talked to him about his segments on “The Tonight Show” and I got a picture. We all just kept chatting back and forth since it was only the 5 of us in the row. We talked about the cruise, about his blog, about celebrity fit club and so on. It was kind of surreal to be having a real conversation with someone you see on TV a lot. But, Ross is one of the nicest people I have ever met. He is real and genuine. No “Hollywood” pretense about him.
Euan played the role of Boy George in “Taboo” in London and on Broadway. He is an amazing singer and was quite funny in the show. I always appreciate a witty sense of humor in someone. The concert was great. He sang songs from Taboo, his cd, and even the theme song from a Barbie movie. It was quite funny. But, when he sang Joni Mitchell’s “River” the mood quickly shifted. Every time I hear that song I think back to the first Christmas after my mom died and I was driving down 94 and was stuck behind a hearse and “River” came on the radio. It was gut-wrenching. Now when I hear that song, I have a hard time not crying. It’s just one of those things.
Rosie and her family ended up sitting in the row in front of us along with Sharon Glese (she played Cagney on “Cagney and Lacey”). After the show, Rosie and Ross talked about going to karaoke and Ross invited us along. I asked Rosie if she would sing “La Isla Bonita” and she said she would. But, unfortunately they didn’t have it. But, how much fun would that have been to see Rosie sing “La Isla Bonita” at karaoke after spending the day on a real tropical island? Once in a lifetime people. Once in a freakin’ lifetime. But, no such luck. Instead Rosie and Ross sang “Don’t Let The Sun Go Down On Me” and it was a comedy gold.
At karaoke I saw Alec Mapa across the bar and sent Tyler over to invite him and his partner to join us. I was thrilled to finally meet Alec. He is a great guy. Very kind and sincere. We all had a great laugh as we watched Ross sing “Unwell”. Ross says he has the voice of an angel. Hummm. But, I got a great picture taken of Rosie, Ross and myself at karaoke. Sweet.
After karaoke we ended up going to grab something to eat at Blue Lagoon. Now Tyler had a little too much to drink and was getting slightly hammered. Is that possible? I guess not…either you are hammered or you are not. Tyler was hammered. Becca was starving and ordered pretty much the whole menu at Blue Lagoon. Chicken strips, macaroni & cheese, fries, soup...you name it. The only thing that wasn’t ordered was the hot dog. I’m not joking. Tyler kept saying he wasn’t hungry. But once he saw the food he must have changed his mind. Here’s what happened…
Becca: *to me* What’s a matter with him?
Jason: He’s drunk.
Becca: Ugh. Tyler you should eat something.
Tyler: No, I’m not hungry.
Becca: Do you want some of my macaroni and cheese?
Tyler: Nope.
*two seconds later*
Tyler: Hey…can I have some of that macaroni and cheese?
Becca: Yeah, I just offered you some.
*Tyler takes the bowl and it’s gone in about four seconds*
Becca: What the hell. You ate it all.
Now…even I know better than to get in-between Becca and her macaroni & cheese. Talk about risking bodily harm and tempting death. It was like watching a train wreck happen right before my eyes. For the rest of the cruise all we heard about was her sunburn and the stolen macaroni & cheese.
Becca turned in for the night and we ran into Ross and his mom and headed down to the Piano bar. It was really nice to just sit and talk and all get to know each other. As the piano bar closed for the night, Rosie and her friend, Jackie, walked past and told Ross that they were going to the casino for awhile. Ross invited us to join them. It was hands down the best time on the whole trip. I never laughed so hard. Rosie is as hysterical in real life as she is on stage. I’m not gonna share what all went on, out of respect for Rosie and her private life. But, trust me. It was hilarious. It was a true glimpse into her life as a regular person and not as a celebrity. One of my favorite moments was running into Sharon Glese in the casino. Since we were with Ross we were welcomed into their little circle of friends. I put my hand out to Sharon and said “Hi, I’m Jason.” And she shook my hand and said “I’m Sharon. Nice to meet you.” (Little did she know in a few short days I would be her saving grace. HA! But, more on that later.) Sharon was so nice and I had some great laughs with Jackie and Rosie.
After awhile we called it a night and went back to the cabin. Of course we woke up Becca to tell her the story of our crazy night and then I tried in vain to fall asleep before them. No such luck. After a few minutes I heard the unmistakable sound of them snoring loudly and sleeping soundly.
Laying there looking at nothing in the darkness…I actually considered going up to the pool deck and try sleeping on a deck chair. But, it was too hot out. I may be awake in the cabin, but at least I was cool. Besides, in just a few short hours it would be time to get up again.
When I got up to the fitness center, Susan came up to me and grabbed me and said how happy she was that I showed up. Now, Susan is a vision of insanity in the morning. She was wearing a tank top with her bra showing, leggings with boxer shorts over the top of them, leg warmers on her knees, and high heel shoes. She then continued to tell me that I will need to modify the poses since I have never done it before and that it was fine. I took my place on my little foam mat in the corner and began stretching. I think it’s actually been years since I stretched out. After a series of loud snaps, crackles, and pops I was ready to begin yoga-ing. Once it started, there was no turning back. Boom! Down on the mat, back up, leg twisted, arm in the air. Over and over and over. Susan would yell at me from across the room. “Jason, get your arm up. Make the line!” “Modify, Jason, modify!” “You did it, Jason. Awesome line!” Then she would come over and poke, prod, poke, pull, poke, and push my body into submission. Downward dog is the only position name I remember. I thought it would be funny to bark once, but when she walked past me I chickened out and went with my better judgment to not do it. Susan would have probably killed me. After an hour of crazy positions and intense sweating class was over. I was exhausted. Yoga is a lot of hard work. Who knew?
After class I returned to cabin and got cleaned up for the day. I was rather looking forward to the adventure of the day…snorkeling off the private island in the Bahamas. How freakin’ cool is that? The ship anchored off the coast of the island and we had to take smaller boats over to the island. While sitting on the ferry boat we were joking around and this guy behind us heard Becca joke about being a surrogate. Well, that got his attention and started drilling her about it. Hilarious. He was a little crazy, if you ask me. Definitely a few fries short of a Happy Meal. A few moments later we saw Rosie and her family get onto our boat. I figured this would be a good time to go and talk to her. So I got up and went down to the lower level of the boat and waited to chat. Here’s the exchange...
Jason: Hi Rosie! I just wanted to thank you for this trip.
Rosie: You’re welcome. I hope you are having fun.
Jason: Yeah, I am... It’s amazing. I won it on your blog.
Rosie: You did? That’s fantastic. Well let me shake your hand.
*gets up and shakes my hand*
Jason: The crazy thing is 10 years ago I worked for your show as an intern.
Rosie: Really? Wow. Wait….was I nice to you?
Jason: Yes, you were. You were very kind to me.
Rosie: That’s good to know. After my show ended everyone started saying how I was a real bitch to them. *she laughs*
Jason: Not to me. You were great. You really were.
And with that I said goodbye and rejoined my friends.
The island was AMAZING. It was beautiful. White sands and crystal clear water. We went snorkeling and saw fish (a lot of Dorys, but no Nemos) and even a stingray. I was a little nervous around the stingray. Granted the Steve Irwin accident was a freak one-in-a million incident, but with my luck I would be the two-in-a-million victim. I have terrible luck with animals. I’ve been bitten by a horse, stalked by a wild turkey, tripped by a puppy, and the list can go on and on. No lie. The stingray was fearless and would go as close to the shore as it could. You would just see people scatter like crazy to get out of it’s path. So clearly I was not alone in being cautious. I loved snorkeling. I had never done it before and I definitely want to do it again. It’s one of the most peaceful and relaxing things I have ever done. I am such a fan of water to begin with. I love all things aquatic (except seaweed), so I was definitely in my element.
We found a small hermit crab by our chairs. I did enjoy playing with it until it pinched my finger. After I was brutally attacked by the crab, I lost all interest in it. Hopefully one of the birds got him. That would be the ultimate revenge. Stupid crab.
The day was spent just hanging out, swimming, snorkeling, and relaxing. Incase you were wondering…yes I did sing “La Isla Bonita” on the island. I did twirl in the sand and splash in the water. “Tropical island breeze…all that makes you wild and free”. Yeah, I did it…and I don’t care who saw it. I’m owning it.
Later than night we went to the Euan Morton concert. Becca scored us seats up in the balcony and Ross the Intern and his mom were in our row. I’m a huge Ross fan, so I talked to him about his segments on “The Tonight Show” and I got a picture. We all just kept chatting back and forth since it was only the 5 of us in the row. We talked about the cruise, about his blog, about celebrity fit club and so on. It was kind of surreal to be having a real conversation with someone you see on TV a lot. But, Ross is one of the nicest people I have ever met. He is real and genuine. No “Hollywood” pretense about him.
Euan played the role of Boy George in “Taboo” in London and on Broadway. He is an amazing singer and was quite funny in the show. I always appreciate a witty sense of humor in someone. The concert was great. He sang songs from Taboo, his cd, and even the theme song from a Barbie movie. It was quite funny. But, when he sang Joni Mitchell’s “River” the mood quickly shifted. Every time I hear that song I think back to the first Christmas after my mom died and I was driving down 94 and was stuck behind a hearse and “River” came on the radio. It was gut-wrenching. Now when I hear that song, I have a hard time not crying. It’s just one of those things.
Rosie and her family ended up sitting in the row in front of us along with Sharon Glese (she played Cagney on “Cagney and Lacey”). After the show, Rosie and Ross talked about going to karaoke and Ross invited us along. I asked Rosie if she would sing “La Isla Bonita” and she said she would. But, unfortunately they didn’t have it. But, how much fun would that have been to see Rosie sing “La Isla Bonita” at karaoke after spending the day on a real tropical island? Once in a lifetime people. Once in a freakin’ lifetime. But, no such luck. Instead Rosie and Ross sang “Don’t Let The Sun Go Down On Me” and it was a comedy gold.
At karaoke I saw Alec Mapa across the bar and sent Tyler over to invite him and his partner to join us. I was thrilled to finally meet Alec. He is a great guy. Very kind and sincere. We all had a great laugh as we watched Ross sing “Unwell”. Ross says he has the voice of an angel. Hummm. But, I got a great picture taken of Rosie, Ross and myself at karaoke. Sweet.
After karaoke we ended up going to grab something to eat at Blue Lagoon. Now Tyler had a little too much to drink and was getting slightly hammered. Is that possible? I guess not…either you are hammered or you are not. Tyler was hammered. Becca was starving and ordered pretty much the whole menu at Blue Lagoon. Chicken strips, macaroni & cheese, fries, soup...you name it. The only thing that wasn’t ordered was the hot dog. I’m not joking. Tyler kept saying he wasn’t hungry. But once he saw the food he must have changed his mind. Here’s what happened…
Becca: *to me* What’s a matter with him?
Jason: He’s drunk.
Becca: Ugh. Tyler you should eat something.
Tyler: No, I’m not hungry.
Becca: Do you want some of my macaroni and cheese?
Tyler: Nope.
*two seconds later*
Tyler: Hey…can I have some of that macaroni and cheese?
Becca: Yeah, I just offered you some.
*Tyler takes the bowl and it’s gone in about four seconds*
Becca: What the hell. You ate it all.
Now…even I know better than to get in-between Becca and her macaroni & cheese. Talk about risking bodily harm and tempting death. It was like watching a train wreck happen right before my eyes. For the rest of the cruise all we heard about was her sunburn and the stolen macaroni & cheese.
Becca turned in for the night and we ran into Ross and his mom and headed down to the Piano bar. It was really nice to just sit and talk and all get to know each other. As the piano bar closed for the night, Rosie and her friend, Jackie, walked past and told Ross that they were going to the casino for awhile. Ross invited us to join them. It was hands down the best time on the whole trip. I never laughed so hard. Rosie is as hysterical in real life as she is on stage. I’m not gonna share what all went on, out of respect for Rosie and her private life. But, trust me. It was hilarious. It was a true glimpse into her life as a regular person and not as a celebrity. One of my favorite moments was running into Sharon Glese in the casino. Since we were with Ross we were welcomed into their little circle of friends. I put my hand out to Sharon and said “Hi, I’m Jason.” And she shook my hand and said “I’m Sharon. Nice to meet you.” (Little did she know in a few short days I would be her saving grace. HA! But, more on that later.) Sharon was so nice and I had some great laughs with Jackie and Rosie.
After awhile we called it a night and went back to the cabin. Of course we woke up Becca to tell her the story of our crazy night and then I tried in vain to fall asleep before them. No such luck. After a few minutes I heard the unmistakable sound of them snoring loudly and sleeping soundly.
Laying there looking at nothing in the darkness…I actually considered going up to the pool deck and try sleeping on a deck chair. But, it was too hot out. I may be awake in the cabin, but at least I was cool. Besides, in just a few short hours it would be time to get up again.
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